Why Is “Bisexual” Such A Charged Word In 2019?

TĐH: Gender is becoming increasingly confusing, unnatural, standardless and meaningless. In New Jersey (USA) parents now can mark in the newborn baby paperwork for birth certificate one of three choices for gender: (1) male, (2) female, and (3) undetermined. “Undetermined” because the parents “don’t know the baby’s gender until the baby is grown up and determines his/her/its gender for him/her/itself.”

by Rory Gory

Bisexual people make up 52 percent of the lesbian, gay, and bisexual (LGB) community, but in recent years, the words to describe the identity of someone who is attracted to more than one gender have become increasingly complex.

As the conversation around gender identity has expanded, so, too, has the language to describe both gender and sexuality as well as the complex interaction of these varying, often fluid identities. This includes new words that describe sexual attraction to more than one gender, including 



, and 


. Additionally, words like 




have been adopted to signify LGB identities without using the traditional labels of 

, or 

As the language around gender and sexuality broadens, what it means to be bisexual broadens, too—making it all the more important to attend to the health needs and outcomes for a growing population that is often overlooked when we talk about the LGBTQ community as a whole.

Are bisexual and binary the same?

Dictionary.com defines 
as “relating to a person who is romantically or sexually attracted to both men and women, or to people of various gender identities; ambisexual.” And, as activist, educator, and speaker Robyn Ochs told 
in March 2019, “I call myself bisexual because I acknowledge in myself the potential to be attracted, romantically and/or sexually, to people of more than one gender, not necessarily at the same time, in the same way, or to the same degree.”

The phrases various gender identities and more than one gender are key because the term 
involves attraction to more than one gender, but those genders are not strictly 


 (i.e., restricted to two genders). Typically, those genders are assumed to be 
men and women. Despite the work of advocates to clarify the definition, many have had a hard time overcoming this assumption. The misunderstanding may stem, in part, from the fact that the 


comes from the Greek for “two,” and that’s a fact we pretty much all know. Compare this to 
, with 


coming from the Greek for “all,” and the misunderstanding becomes clearer.


person can be attracted to people of any gender or to people regardless of their gender. Many are increasingly adopting the word 
as an alternative to 
 because it causes less confusion when it comes to gender attraction
A 2017 survey by the Human Rights Campaign (HRC) found that 14 percent of youth respondents identified as 
, doubling from 7 percent in a 2012 survey. And, it’s not just teens: High-profile figures like Miley Cyrus and Janelle Monáe have notably identified as 
, helping to popularize the term.



Miley Cyrus’ “She’s Not Him” is a pansexual milestone in mainstream music http://blbrd.cm/9U7tpw 

Miley Cyrus’ ‘She’s Not Him’ Is A Pansexual Milestone In Mainstream Music

Miley Cyrus’ “She’s Not Him” gives voice to identities not usually represented in mainstream music.


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The 2017 HRC survey also found that 34 percent of youth identify as 
, down only moderately from 38 percent in 2012, suggesting that terms like 
are giving people more ways to express the complexity of self, which was perhaps unavailable to previous generations.

Complexity, indeed. Monáe has also used the words 
to define herself, showing just how much flux there can be in the language around gender and sexuality. Whether someone uses 
, the point is that neither term limits sexual attraction to cisgender men or women. Both involve attraction to more than one gender—which isn’t limited to a binary of men and women.

Why do we have to label everything?

Expanding language has been a joyful vehicle for self-expression for many young people. With the internet, using more specific language to filter through millions of results makes it much easier to find other people who share an identity. Words that describe the nuances of gender and sexuality can create community as people discover that they are not alone in their experiences.

But for others, especially those outside the LGBTQ community, the proliferation of labels has created confusion and discord. And, within the LGBTQ community, some have chosen to avoid labels altogether too. For those who are questioning their gender or sexual identity, avoiding labels can be a way to explore without committing to a self-definition that could change. For those who are fluid, labels may feel constricting rather than liberating.

Why can’t there be one term for everyone?


has become a common catch-all term for anything that’s not strictly heterosexual and cisgender. While many older generations still remember the use of 
as a slur, younger generations and popular media have reclaimed the word.

While some use 
to encompass the full diversity of the LGBTQ experience, others have have used the word 


to encompass the entire LGBTQ community, such as describing 
gay rights

gay marriage
, and 
gay conversion therapy
. Using one word can unify the community into a larger minority group to more effectively advocate together for social change. However, using the word 
to describe the entire LGBTQ community has also reflected the centering of gay cisgender men in policy change and advocacy, with the needs of lesbians, queer women, bisexuals, trans, and nonbinary people relegated to the sidelines.

It wouldn’t matter if, as a whole, all our needs were the same. However, the differing labels for sexuality aren’t just creative ways of describing identity. These labels also reflect different lived experiences for population groups with statistically distinct health outcomes. And, for bisexual youth, that can mean bullying, feelings of despair, and attempted suicide at higher rates than their heterosexual or homosexual peers.

What are biphobia and bi-erasure?

According to combined data from the 2015–2017 Youth Risk Behavior Surveys from the CDC
, there were often significant differences between bisexual youth and their homosexual and heterosexual peers. For example, 66 percent of bisexual youth reported feeling sad and hopeless in the past 12 months of the survey collection, compared to 49 percent gay and lesbian youth and 27 percent of heterosexual youth.

Twenty-seven percent of bisexual youth attempted suicide in the past 12 months, vs. 19 percent gay and lesbian youth and 6 percent heterosexual youth.

The experience of bullying also showed substantial differences: 36 percent of bisexual youth reported bullying on school property, compared to 27 percent of gay and lesbian youth and 18 percent of heterosexual youth. *
The national study only collected assigned sex at birth of respondents, not gender identity, which could provide additional insights if collected.

And this leads us to biphobia. Just as individuals who are homosexual are forced to confront the hatred of 


, individuals who are bisexual face 
, or “the hatred of and discrimination against bisexual people.” People of any sexual orientation—including those within the LGBTQ community—can perpetuate biphobia. Common biphobic stereotypes are that bisexual people are dishonest, promiscuous, and in denial of their true sexuality. There is also the common misconception that all bisexual people are 

These stereotypes are actually a form of 


, which is when bisexuals are assumed to be gay, lesbian, or straight, or have their sexual identity otherwise invalidated or erased by saying they are in denial or dishonest. It is a serious issue both within the LGBTQ community and the world at large for many bisexuals. Bisexual people often struggle to find community, especially when the umbrella term gay is used to describe all LGBTQ people.

The Trevor Project


13 Lies We Have to Stop Telling About Bisexual People ⚡️ @elielcruz debunks common misconceptions http://everydayfeminism.com/2014/10/13-lies-about-bisexuals/#.WML3q8sVL4c.twitter 

13 Lies We Have to Stop Telling About Bisexual People – Everyday Feminism

Despite all of the gains the LGBTQIA+ community has made, bisexual people are still looked upon with confusion — or outright scorn — by gay, lesbian, and straight people alike. Here we are in the…


113 people are talking about this

This is why having multiple words to account for our diverse identities is crucial, especially for gathering data on a population experiencing adversity such as 
or for a group who is feeling erased from the conversation all together. As we expand language for both sexuality and gender identity, we may find even more startling statistics among varying groups. However, as language becomes more specific, researchers are struggling to get large enough sample sizes to create statistically relevant data and that means certain groups are going unnoticed.

The future of LGBTQ language

The differences in mental health outcomes among gay, lesbian, and bisexual youth highlight the necessity and urgency of learning more about these vulnerable populations’s distinct needs. One powerful tool to do that could be the US Census. But currently, the 
2020 Census
will only count same-sex couples, continuing the erasure of single queer people, as well as bisexual, transgender, and nonbinary people. And, with the current administration’s efforts to 


out of legal existence
, it’s more clear than ever that words have power. It’s important that governments and organizations use language to recognize the specific identities and needs of the populations that they serve so we can create laws and policies to support the people who need it most.

Last year, 
The Trevor Project
—the leading national organization providing crisis intervention and suicide prevention services to LGBTQ young people under 25—expanded our definition of the acronym 
to mean “lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, queer & questioning.” We added 

and questioning
to reflect the language that the youth we serve are using to define themselves. This change took careful listening, research, and planning to implement across the organization.

Still, no one advocate, organization, or government has been able to fully regulate the language we use to define ourselves, because language belongs to everyone. The LGBTQ community is evolving along with the language we use.

Language is fluid and changes to reflect our growth as people and as a society. It should both serve to unify and clarify. We all deserve words to describe the nuances of our experience and to speak about our commonalities. Words should be functional and expressive, and so in the spirit of bisexuality, let’s use language to do both.

Rory Gory is the Digital Marketing Manager for The Trevor Project, the leading national organization providing crisis intervention and suicide prevention services to lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, queer & questioning (LGBTQ) young people under 25.  If you or anyone you know is in crisis, reach out to The Trevor Project for support at: thetrevorproject.org/help.
Rory’s work can also be found in Teen Vogue and them.

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